About Networking - Getting Personal

Just to share a bit about my own experience.

Back when I was still a full-time employee, I pigeon-holed myself in my own little world, happy and content of my career and what was to come up. Obviously I had my ups and downs, triumphant moments and set-backs, but in general, I was very much a company man. Through trials and tribulations, I finally got made, in the Wall Street jargon - I made it to the front office and became part of a structured transaction team.

Then the credit crisis hit and the layoff was a wake-up call, probably the best that could have happened to my career. With myself over 40 and a family of three young kids, I had to do a lot of hard thinking. Not necessarily worried about finding a job immediately but my main concern was: what if it happens to me again when I am 50.

One major takeaway from that period is the value of networking, and the very reason that I decided to stay on consulting instead of taking it as a mere transition. Among others, consulting provides a great opportunity for me to meet with interesting and talented people and expand my network significantly.

In hindsight, I was institutionalized (borrowing a concept from "Shawshank Redemption"). The world has moved on and I was too afraid to venture out of my comfort zone due to my family obligation, the perceived risks and the list goes on.

Here is the official definition of "institutionalized":


However, I am not saying that you should quit your current full-time job and venture into the wild wild west. I still fully believe the boot-camp of an institution, through which you will be properly trained for the right tools, social / political skills, rational self-assessment and value-set, before you are ready on your own. For that, please refer to a previous post - Career Advice (click me).

So how do you network?

Here are a few excerpts from "Never Eat Alone" that I hope you find interesting. It's never too late to start networking but it's always too late when you need it the most. Refer to "Why NEA?" (click me)

Thanks for linking-in with me. That's a good start. Bottom line is: my network is yours to lose.

Note: Originally sent as an email (with some modifications) to someone I tried to network with and then shared with my young friends on July 26, 2012. The bits about "institutionalized" are today's additions.

Social Media

For the uninitiated, the attached article (click me) was not just some random gossiping.

1. Bob Diamond is or was the CEO of Barclay. You more or less heard the Libor related fiasco or scandal that hit the headlines these days.

2. Nell works at Deutsche Bank as an associate on the trading floor. One of my colleagues, being male curious, saw her on the trading desk the previous Friday, noted her name and checked her out on the group directory. Which was quite innocent until the news broke out. Quite a déjà vu, surreal and funny.

Anyway, there is no privacy this day and age. Or privacy, as we all know, is being redefined.

"Improvise, Adapt, Overcome." (U.S. Marine Corps unofficial mantra)

Embrace it. Shying away is not an option. You will find yourself shutting down rich ways of communication and falling behind your competitors.

However, you do need to understand that there are always two sides to a position. Social media, great as it is, is a double-edged sword. Practice it and be proficient at it.

Note: shared with my young friends on July 11, 2012.

Known v. Unknown

Keep the life in suspense. Keep it interesting. Keep it full of discoveries.

Move down the "known" ladder:

- the "known known": something is gonna happen; you age as the time ticks.

- the "known unknown": you know something is gonna happen, but not sure what. Like you are pretty sure you are going to miss something when you are packing for your trip but just don't know what.

- the "unknown known": you know something is happening but not sure when. Like you will somehow break your coffee mug but had you known when...

- the "unknown unknown": that's what makes life full of challenges, colorful, and never a dull moment.

Note: First appeared as a Facebook post - a spontaneous comment on a photo, where transparent tents are hanging up in the trees around sundown - quite an interesting concept, hence the introductory comment of "keep the life in suspense." I shared with my young friends on July 10, 2012.

The Last Lecture

Be inspired.

"On September 18, 2007, computer science professor Randy Pausch stepped in front of an audience of 400 people at Carnegie Mellon University to deliver a last lecture called “Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams.” With slides of his CT scans beaming out to the audience, Randy told his audience about the cancer that is devouring his pancreas and that will claim his life in a matter of months. On the stage that day, Randy was youthful, energetic, handsome, often cheerfully, darkly funny. He seemed invincible. But this was a brief moment, as he himself acknowledged.

Randy’s lecture has become a phenomenon, as has the book he wrote based on the same principles, celebrating the dreams we all strive to make realities. Sadly, Randy lost his battle to pancreatic cancer on July 25th, 2008, but his legacy will continue to inspire us all, for generations to come."

About Randy Pausch:

Randy Pausch was a professor of Computer Science, Human Computer Interaction, and Design at Carnegie Mellon University. From 1988 to 1997, he taught at the University of Virginia. He was an award-winning teacher and researcher, and worked with Adobe, Google, Electronic Arts (EA), and Walt Disney Imagineering, and pioneered the non-profit Alice project. (Alice is an innovative 3-D environment that teaches programming to young people via storytelling and interactive game-playing.) He also co-founded The Entertainment Technology Center at Carnegie Mellon with Don Marinelli. (ETC is the premier professional graduate program for interactive entertainment as it is applies across a variety of fields.) Randy lost his battle with pancreatic cancer on July 25th, 2008. More (click me)



Note: Originally appeared in my email to my young friends on May 13, 2012. When I first saw the clip, it was still a gripping story. Randy Pausch has since moved on but his legacy stays forever.

Be Shameless and Steal From Me

You may well have read or listened to this. But it doesn't hurt to refresh your memory once in a while. Steve Job's Stanford Commencement Speech (click me)



Keep your passion kindled, as this will keep you going for a long time to come.

Then you need a North Star to point you to your true north as you navigate your water, troubled or not.

I will be your North Star. A shameless proposition on my part. :)

To steal a page from Jobs again:

"The Apple raid on Xerox PARC is sometimes described as one of the biggest heists in the chronicles of industry. Jobs occasionally endorsed this view, with pride. As he once said, “Picasso had a saying—‘good artists copy, great artists steal’—and we have always been shameless about stealing great ideas.”" - Jobs' biography

Be shameless and steal from me.

Note: The above originally appeared in an email I sent to my young friends on April 28, 2012.

Why "NEA"?

"NEA" is short for "Never Eat Alone" (say "open sesame" and click).

It is the title of a book on networking that I recommended to many of my friends.

Networking, what a cliché! You can associate the term with many things that are not and hence the book. To me, the new open secret ingredient of the job market is, "networking, networking, networking".

It took me 20 years to figure out the wisdom in the book and I didn't realize it's right there. Put things into context, the author was, at one time, the youngest partner with Deloitte Consulting.

Here are a few samplings from the book.

"The loyalty and security once offered by organization can be provided by our own networks. Lifetime corporate employment is dead; we are all free agents now, managing our own careers across multiple jobs and companies. And because today's primary currency is information, a wide-reaching network is one of the surest ways to become and remain thought leaders of our respective fields."

"Today, I have over 5,000 people on my palm who will answer the phone when I call. They are there to offer expertise, jobs, help, encouragement and support, and yes, even care and love. The very successful people I know are, as a group, not especially talented, educated, or charming. But they all have a circle of trustworthy, talented and inspirational people who they can call upon."

"This book outlines the secrets behind the success of so many accomplished people; they are secrets that are rarely recognized by business schools, career counselors, or therapists. By incorporating the ideas in this book, you too can become the center of a circle of relationships, one that will help you succeed throughout life."

"I enjoy giving career advice and counseling. It's almost a hobby. I've done this with hundreds of young people, and I get enormous satisfaction hearing from them later on as their careers progress. There are times when I can make a big difference in a young person's life. I can open a door or place a call or set up an internship - one of those simple acts by which destinies are altered."

"The currency of real networking is not greed but generosity."

"A goal is a dream with a deadline."

About Leadership

"From Payton, gift of grabs" - USA Today, Oct 3, 2012

"Even after four neck surgeries, a full season of not playing and all the questions about whether a 36-year-old, re-built, rusty Peyton Manning was still an NFL difference-maker. He was already making a difference." - Four neck surgeries! And still coming back?!!!

"Then Manning was calling all the players in the Broncos passing game and organizing unofficial work-outs on Denver high school fields. It took young wide receiver Eric Decker about a half-second to agree to whatever, whenever." - Command and respect

"Once training camp arrived, Manning demonstrated to his new teammates that his reputation for having an unwavering work ethics was well-earned and that he expected no less from them." - Lead by example and work hard

"Given Manning a few months with a team, and it's no surprise he can put together the kind of passing game he and the Broncos had against the Oakland Raiders on Sunday, when Manning completed 30 of 38 passes for 338 yards and three touchdowns in a 37-6 victory." - And he delivers.

Now - that's leadership.

Career Advice

I have moved around a lot in the past 10 - 15 years. The grass was always greener on the other side. Just wanted to find my team and mentor and get set for the career. "Still haven't found what I am looking for" was the theme.

After hearing a few success stories, I had my Eureka moment and had been preaching that since.

- Know what you want. Focus on NOW, no matter what. And do well. Things will happen."

The takeaway or paraphrase is:

- always focus on NOW and do well even in time of adversity. Don't worry about the payoff - it will be there.

My theory:

It's a matter of survivorship. Within any organization, the management structure is a pyramid, arguably some are flatter and some are more tiered.

So only a few can make it to the top. It's just pure statistics. The career paths of the majority will flatten out at some point. Facing a choice, most tend to move to the grass that's greener or they will leave the organization for all the reasons in the world, better pay, better boss, better hours, work / life balance, better career path, the list goes on.

If,

- you hang on,
- you work hard,
- you have the end game in sight,
- you keep improving and reinventing yourself
- you get yourself ready for the moment

then one day, you will get the call.

Not because you are the best of the best, but because you ARE:

"The last man standing."

of your vintage year.

I rest my case.

p.s. I have a few good case studies to back up my hypothesis.